Sick and tired

But not in a completely bad way.

Well sick in a bad way. Sick is always a bad way...I felt better on Friday too, but then on Saturday and Sunday, I couldn't breath. Hello, thank you, disease for attacking my lungs! Sunday I did work on a substantial portion of my paper though, which officially fried my brain. Incidentally, I couldn't even sleep that well because I was all stuffy. I distinctively remember waking up because my face hurt, because I saw fire trucks outside the dorm and for other reason =_=

This morning I had my history exam. I was up intil 2ish studying and got up like 4 and a half hours later. So yeah, I'm tired. Work was painless though. Hopefully next semester my dinner shift is always that painless. History exam was long, but I knew what I was talking about.

When I got back, I was once again brain dead. Now I'm procrastinating again...I still have that paper, I need to pack and I have another exam to study for. Incidentally I'm watching anime now!

As summer approaches, I get anxious that I'm going to spend the next three months of my life doing nothing. If I got a job, I'd feel slightly better...I saw a post by her (not the her I'm in love with...the other her but speaking of the her I'm in love with, I'm not going to see her much beyong Thursday...and to think, she'll never know, I secretly want her). But her post read "Have a lot of stuff going on in May, but it'll be great." I don't have a lot going on in May. I have nothing going on except my plans to finish playing FF13 when I get home. Then I started worrying about preparing for the GRE because I'm going to take it soon after I get back from studying abroad. And then here I am about to face doing nothing...I don't like it. I should be doing something to prepare for a future career.

See my problem now is that I have grown up. I consider myself more grown up, and thus disconnected with my younger self. I do feel kind of bad though-bad about my once friends going to the convention this weekend, bad because I'm no longer a part of that world.

What world am I a part of? A grown-up college world? But I won't be there over the summer.